Saturday, February 25, 2006

On the other hand ...

My Dad points out that a decent cup of Tim's, and a cruller or two might get the Taliban to chill out a little.

The Double-Double peace plan .. it just might work!

Timbits for everyone!

What a bunch of wankers.

I nearly drove my car off the road last night.

I was listening to The World at Six on CBC. One of the lead stories was about the Canadian military's deployment to Khandahar, Afghanistan. General Rick Hillier was explaining and selling the mission to the Canadian public. He made the pitch for better funding, better equipment, and a Tim Horton's outlet. All of these wishes seemed to carry equal gravity.

There's a recurring theme here. Over the past few weeks, numerous articles decrying the lack of Tim's in Afghanistan have made their way into print.

This saucy piece in today's Toronto Star is typical in its whiny tone:

Tim, you do have a public relations department, yes? We weren't sure because, well, Burger King is here. And Pizza Hut. And Subway. Come to think of it, where is your friend Wendy?

What these wankers the writers of these missives fail to realize, is that the vast American Army and Air Force Exchange System (AAFES) and Naval Exchange System (NEX) own the Burger King, Subway, Pizza Hut and McDonald's franchises that grace the US military bases both stateside and abroad. The fact that one can get a whopper in Baghdad has nothing to do with the benevolent nature of Burger King, and everything to do with its profit margin.

Tim Horton's makes regular, substantial donations of cans of coffee to Canadian troops serving overseas or onboard ship. I've sent many a tin of Tim Horton's Fine Grind to my husband over the years, to many less-than-exotic locations worldwide. It's good stuff, and I certainly understand the desire for a double-double.

But ...

The Canadian Armed Forces has a long and proud tradition of peacekeeping missions in places like Cyprus, Bosnia, and Croatia. Somehow, they've all managed to get through the deployments without a Tim Horton's franchise next door.

To apply public pressure on a company to set up shop in a dangerous country is silly and greedy.

I really must learn not to listen to the news when I'm driving.

Friday, February 24, 2006

No wonder my pets were acting so weird tonight!

Magnitude 4.5 quake rocks Ottawa, western Quebec

Gandalf is still acting strange, so there will probably be more aftershocks tonight.

Phrase of the day

"Strategically placed rubber chicken"

The Olympic Men's Curling Bronze Medal match was interrupted today by a streaker with a strategically placed rubber chicken running across the ice.

J-Mac

If this story doesn't make you just a little verklempt - then kindly check yourself into the nearest cardiac ward for a transplant.

Jason McElwain, a high school senior, is the manager for the Greece Athena (Rochester, NY) varsity basketball team.

Last week, he was given the chance to suit up and play in the last few minutes of the last home game of the season.

In the last four minutes of the game, this 5'6" athlete scored 20 points, tying the school record for points scored in one game.

Oh, by the way - he's autistic.

Go, J-Mac. You're my hero.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Overheard


Steve: I like your Batman shirt. Where did you get it?

William: At Walmart. While you were in Iraq.

Steve: Are you still a big Batman fan?

William: No, I'm a small Batman fan.


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Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Whoops, I was wrong!

I had predicted that Beckie Scott would stand atop the podium after the Cross Country Ski sprints. She finished a respectable fourth.

Chandra Crawford of Canmore won the Gold!!!! WooooHooo!!

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Mom, does this soften your stance on Rex just a bit?

Rex Murphy's Point of View about Wayne Gretzky is spot-on.

He says, in part:

And in Wayne Gretzky we have an instance of a man and a career that has given an almost miraculous example of coping with fame, keeping some sense of privacy, honouring his parents and living clean. He has kept his side of this unspoken bargain, he has been the greatest ambassador for hockey we've ever seen and in a tawdry age has lived, shock, a decent life.

So now my only real comment on this gambling story is I take his word on it. And until and unless there is real evidence, as opposed to a tsunami of rumours and speculation, leave him alone. I don't care if his wife bets or doesn't bet or how much she bets or when. This guy has earned a bit of distance from the rampaging press. He has earned a bit of respect. He is not a politician. He doesn't owe answers unless, beyond rumour, there is something real about which to ask him.

Quote of the day

"Wayne Gretzky has a reputation for telling the truth. His character has never been questioned. He is a quintessential Canadian."

Pollster John Wright, in reference to an Ipsos-Reid poll which showed that 86% of Canadians surveyed did not change their opinions of Wayne Gretzky because of anything they'd heard, read, or seen about the alleged gambling scandal.

Friday, February 17, 2006

How to avoid Wife Aggro


Create a superhero in her likeness. Presenting La Fee en Rose, who does battle in City of Villians when she isn't blogging.

Yeah, I'm onto you, dear husband! Muchos besos!
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Amen

United Church of Canada Expresses Regret over Muhammad Cartoons.

Wax on, wax off

Yves Bilodeau had harsh words for himself after it became clear that he had chosen the wrong wax combinations for Beckie Scott yesterday. Ms. Scott handled the technical setback with true Olympic grace. Look for her on the podium next week after the sprints!

Hey Mom, CBC Sports is now #1 on my list

They earned this dubious distinction after publishing this steaming pile of dog crap masquerading as journalism.

Yes, my beloved Emanuel had a bad free skate. It happens.

To CBC.ca reader "Diane" who was quoted in the linked article, I say: Bite me, bitch! How many Canadian Championships do you have under your belt? When was the last time you laced up your skates?

Prediction: Emanuel Sandhu will be World Champion next month in Calgary.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Buttle Bellisimo!!


Well done! Northern Ontario's Jeffrey Buttle won the bronze metal in Men's Figure Skating.

I must confess, I was actually rooting for the mercurial, ethereal Emanuel Sandhu, but it was not to be today.
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Cherry weighs in

Don Cherry does not approve of the way that the Canadian women's hockey team has been running up their scores against weaker teams. He says that this is "not the Canadian way."

Hmmm.

I wonder if the same criticisms, including my own, would be levelled against the men's team. Is it un-Canadian to trounce one's (clearly inferior) opponent, or is it just un-ladylike?

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Zen and the art of waxing skis

Many years ago, in the pristine boreal forests of Northern Ontario, Miniature Rose flew over the cross country ski trails in a quest to bring eternal glory to her beloved Raiders.

Well, some days she flew. On other days, when the Swix wax and the snow failed to achieve that perfect but elusive symbiotic relationship, allowing for both perfect long glides and powerful kicks, frustration abounded and ski poles may have been thrown. In those days, a Swix wall thermometer was our best guide to wax selection.

At the Winter Olympics in Torino, the Canadian Cross Country Ski team relies on wax technician Yves Bilodeau to prep their skis. M. Bilodeau has the coolest job in the world. From the CBC article:

Bilodeau's job is to make skiers confident in their equipment. Most days it's a sixth sense for wax technicians. Bilodeau says they usually know exactly the kind of wax they'll be using in the few steps they walk to the van on the morning of the race, before they actually check temperature, snow and humidity readings.

"You look at the athlete and you tell them that this is good, it's going to work," Bilodeau says. "Don't stress, go for it and you're going to have a really good ski."

When they arrive at the course on race day, Bilodeau and the technicians begin by verifying humidity readings, snow and air temperatures near the start area. But as altitude fluctuates, so does snow condition, and the blend of wax can change with every fraction of a degree.

Rather than test the temperature of every topographic ripple, Bilodeau delegates one wax technician to ski the course and report back on the performance of the wax. This can take up to four hours for the 50-kilometre race.

Bilodeau chooses high-priced, high-tech, powdered fluorocarbon waxes for special races. This application is a fine powder that requires technicians to wear filtered masks.

Some days the expensive wax works best and one pair of skis can end up with $60 to $100 worth of the stuff layered on it. Other days, the cheap wax will suffice. That's why they test.


It's a far cry from a tool box full of little cans of wax and klister, an old iron, and a colourful wall clock!

PS to my dubious husband: I told you so!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Big skates to fill

And boy howdy, does Gillian Apps fill them!

The granddaughter of the legendary Syl Apps (three Stanley Cups, MPP, Minister of Correctional Services, philanthropist, Member of the Order of Canada) scored a hat trick in Canada's 8-1 victory over Sweden today. Well done!

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Well done ladies

But perhaps you could show a little more restraint next time? We all expect the Canadian Women's Hockey team to do well, but trouncing the host country 16-0 is just showing off.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Preach it, Brother Don!

Don Cherry has jumped to Gretzky's defence.

Balance is being restored to the universe.

Some quotable quotes from tonight's Coach's Corner:

"It's absolutely ridiculous when you see what they've done to this guy," said Cherry, holding up newspaper headlines about Gretzky in his weekly Coach's Corner segment on CBC's Hockey Night in Canada.

"All this here is beyond the pale and I feel so sorry for him. He did not do anything wrong."


To re-iterate: The Great One has done nothing wrong.

"This is a tough time for Gretzky. This has been a tough year," a reference to the deaths of his mother and grandmother.

Authorities have said they do not intend to charge any bettors because placing a bet is not illegal.

There was no indication that any wagers were made on hockey games, and no evidence Gretzky placed any bets, investigators said.


For the mentally challenged members of the press, let us repeat that: Wayne Gretzky has done nothing wrong. So back the f@$k off!

And the last word goes to Don Cherry:

"Go over there and win gold and stick it in [the media's] ear."

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Finally!!!

A trip planner courtesy of Tim Horton's!

There are 82 centres of double-double worship within 2 kilometers of the route between my house and my brother's place in Malton.

Jesus H. Christ on a flapjack!

So, this guy in Ohio is making pancakes, and as he flips his concoction, Jesus appears to him.

I think the message got a little garbled, though. I am quite sure that Jesus was saying, go to Mass, cut back on the refined carbohydrates, and don't you dare pour that fake syrup on Me. I don't think our Lord and Saviour really meant for his pancake-tastic visage to be hawked on ebay.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Laundry day


There are a few extra loads today. I don't mind. Posted by Picasa

Actually, in Italy, it's a good omen ...

Looks like a pigeon decided that Katie Couric needed little more hair product this morning.

~~~snicker~~~

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Puppy Love


Happy Dog-iversary to Lady Chocolate, who has lived with us for three years now.

I don't know if she can sniff out an impending epileptic seizure, and we don't spend much time dancing, but she is a marvellous personal trainer, and a loyal friend.
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Thursday, February 02, 2006

"Addicted to oil"

From the New York Daily News:

Bush on move is Guzzler in Chief

Offered without further comment.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Hooked on Hasselhoff!

I can't help it!!! This little video for the Hoff's cover of Hooked on a Feeling is brilliant.

There are dachshunds with diamond collars!!! What's not to love?

The Hasselhoff, he is comfortable in his celebrity.

You're bloody well right you screwed up!!!! And "2245 dead" isn't an anti-war slogan. It's the God Damned Truth (TM).  Posted by Picasa