Sunday, February 22, 2009

Soon, I shall rule the world!

The chain stores around here are notorious for stocking their shelves with merchandise that is completely out of sync with the season. I learned this lesson many years ago, when I attempted to purchase mittens for my son in January, in the snow belt. I could have bought myself a bikini and some sunscreen, but there were no mittens to be found in the snowbelt in January.

So I have made it a habit to stock up on winter supplies in September and October. I feel a surge of deep satisfaction when I can gaze lovingly on my arsenal of Buckley's cold syrup, brandy, and Puffs Tissues with Vicks. Old Man Winter can bring on his worst, and I can laugh in his face.

Sometimes, I think that my paranoia runs a little too deep, but I was vindicated yesterday. I was at Target when I overheard someone asking an employee if they carried Puffs with Vicks. I knew exactly where they should have been located, having bought several boxes there myself. Alas, the shelves were devoid of those fantastically comforting pieces of paper, in the middle of cold and flu season.

This little ant knows the location of a great stash of Puffs with Vicks.



I might be persuaded to share my stash, for a price. Perhaps $10/tissue?

My 401K might be tanking, but at least I had the foresight to invest in some valuable commodities!

Mwah.
Ha.
Ha.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

But do you have a stash of Tetley's herbal teas?

Val said...

You are fantastic!!!!